Choosing Recovery

Samaritan House resident returns after struggle with drugs

Wes lives with two threats to his life every day: HIV and addiction. A self-described former “club kid,” he was an active user of drugs and alcohol for many years. Unfortunately, his reckless lifestyle caught up with him in February of 2000, when he was diagnosed with HIV.

College-educated and personable, Wes was successful and socially active.  His HIV diagnosis came as an understandable shock to him and his family. “My family thought at first it was a death sentence,” says Wes, about the moment he shared his status with them. “Most of them put the phone down to cry.  My mom was the strongest.  She said, ‘We just need a plan.’”

Buttressed by his mother’s strength and resolve, Wes began to seek support. A common friend introduced him to Samaritan House through Steve Dutton, the organization’s President and CEO. Although the new environment took some getting used to, Wes soon felt at home within the embrace of his new Samaritan House family.

“I grew accustomed to Sam House” says Wes, “and am extremely grateful for the opportunities I have had as a result of Sam House that I would otherwise not had.”

Wes’ road to recovery has not always been a smooth one. After moving back out on his own in 2003, he relapsed. Having lived through significant loss already, Wes tried to maintain his human resources position at a local human services agency and to stay on the right track. His efforts to regain control on his own were relatively effective until another battle with substance abuse during the summer of 2005.

“I started to drink occasionally and then started to use ice (methamphetamines),” recalls Wes.  “The addiction progressed faster than before.” He resigned his job of four years, and felt like his world was crumbling.

“I had convinced myself that I must be some sort of sociopath,” he says. “(I kept) making decisions that led me back to active addiction and subsequently employment loss, housing loss, financial instability, and the hardship placed on my family and friends.”

 Wes entered an intensive drug treatment program for two months. He describes the first month as disorienting and difficult. The counselors at the center offered him a more hopeful perspective, and over time, he saw his life once again out from under the shadow of drugs.

Back on his own, Wes needed somewhere to live. The prospect of returning to Samaritan House felt like a failure of sorts, but he was welcomed back with open arms. “When I spoke with Ted (Vice President and COO) about coming back to Samaritan House,” says Wes, “he said, ‘Come home.’” 

Wes credits a supportive family, daily A.A. and N.A. meetings, a committed sponsor and the Samaritan House counseling staff for helping him maintain sobriety. He recognizes that his recovery cannot be an afterthought, but rather, must be his top priority for the time being. Not one to sit idly by, however, Wes has begun volunteering for the Samaritan House administrative staff, as he keeps his eyes open for a position that will work with his recovery program.

With plans to attend graduate school and eventually a career in social work, Wes is wary of the pitfalls his addiction presents around every corner.

“I have constant fears of being weak or vulnerable,” he says.  “I do know that drugs and alcohol always lead me to places where I am unemployed and, but for the grace of my family, homeless.  I constantly have to make the choice to stay sober.”